Snowed in? Snuggle in. It’s only Snowpocalypse

by Joseph Newman, Caretaker

If you are one of the very busy people, always making plans, rushing around, adjusting your Google calendars, clawing and scratching to add and subtract tasks, work, events, and that all important “me” time into your already, “my waistline was 29”… back in college… slim fit” muffin-top inducing, size 35” in reality, schedule.

Then, it’s time to slow down, snuggle in, grab some hot coco, and add another notch of “me” time to your belt because it’s the…Snowpocalypse. Well, at least here in Washington…

As I write this, our high school honor-roll and basketball state champion, governor Jay Inslee (and my mom’s old high school crush, Ingraham High school, class of 69’, peace and love, go Rams!) has declared a state of emergency, as we brace for, “…a storm unlike one we’ve seen in many years,” and though this Snowpocalypse is not as intense as their oft misunderstood goth cousin, Apocalypse, it still comes with dangers, and four, all very distinguished, horse-riders we should talk about.

Sniffles (Pestilence)

Layers! If you have the privilege, the grace and good fortune, and the option to stay indoors, warm and comfortable. Snuggle in. Lock the door and throw the key into the snow, just don’t forget to pick it up when the snow melts. If you need to go out, layer UP!

Layers are you best friend. Blankets, fireplace and warm drinks help warm the body.

Spending time with family and friends and playing games warms the heart.

If you’re lucky enough to have power and internet let a Google search for funny animals meme’s warm the soul. For example, I typed in some keywords “batman, warm-up scene, meme” hoping to get, an image with text( a meme), from a scene in the 2005 movie “Batman Begins” for this article, but instead I found this…and I could not be more spiritually fulfilled.

Munchies (Famine)

In this instance of Snowpocalypse, we were blessed to know ahead of time that a storm was coming. Hopefully, people were able to go to the store and grab food and other supplies before the storm really took hold. If not, it’s ok to get creative and settle with what you have rather than brave the outdoors because you don’t really need your grande, double shot espresso, mocha, made with soy milk.  

If you weren’t so lucky this time and have to go out for whatever reason, please read on…

Boo Boo’s (Injury/death)

First aid is always good to have and know, but I would stick to the tried and true “Buddy system” if you need to go out or do anything outdoors. The snow might look fluffy and soft like a bunny, but it’s more like a possum playing dead. It can still bite. Underneath the snow or areas where the snow has melted and froze over (black ice), especially on residential streets and walkways that don’t get paved or salted as often, it can be particularly treacherous. Wear layers, and a good pair of snow boots or a pair of slip on snow spikes (like image above) if you can.

But don’t forget to bring a “Buddy”.

Road Rage (War)

Now, I recommend NOT to drive, unless you absolutely have too. Washington State DOT has a whole page on driving tips. I recommend reviewing before you drive. Also, you can check traffic camera feed, live, in your neighborhood to double check road conditions and current traffic flows. Just type into Google, your city or county name and add the keywords “traffic cams” to find the cameras in your neighborhood. Some of the driving tips that stuck out for me is “Drive slower… Accelerate slower” and if you find yourself glancing into your rearview at a person speedily encroaching on that all important rear “space cushion” there is no shame in pulling over and letting them pass. When it is safe for you to do so, of course.

Above all, stay indoors. Snuggle in. It’s just Snowpocalypse.  

References and Links

https://parks.state.wa.us/151/Winter-safety – Information about what to wear

http://www.wsdot.com/winter/ – Information about driving in snow and winter

http://bellevue.com/traffic.php – Traffic cams live updates

https://www.cnn.com/2019/02/08/us/seattle-snow-weather-friday-wxc/index.html – State of Emergency Information

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jay_Inslee – information about Jay inslee (Sadly, my mom is never mentioned) 

https://www.pinterest.com/TagaPet/pet-memes/?lp=true – Pet Memes (Bat Cat)

https://tragerlaw.biz/slip_on_ice_cleats.html – Slip on snow spikes